What do happier older men do that unhappier older men do not?
Happy men, of any age, but especially older and wiser men, do things and live their lives doing things that make them happy. And just as importantly, they stop doing things that make them unhappy.
You may have spent huge amounts of your life doing things you did not want to in the mistaken belief that you had to. I certainly did. I have vivid memories (nightmares sometimes) of the wasted years of my life doing things I had zero interest in doing.
Some of the worst for me:
I do not do any of that stupid stuff anymore.
It's simplest to stop doing the wrong things as it is less effort to stop doing something than it is to start doing something. At least physically. The other people involved will certainly try to force you to continue doing things you don't want for their benefit.
Don't stay involved with people who overly restrict you. If they try to run your life...F...em.
You want to be in charge of your life.
Figure out what you need to end and then act on the solutions as rapidly, persistently and with as much positive action as you can.
From Mike Cernovich - 43 for 43
A few favorite quotes -
Money doesn’t buy happiness, but it buys relief from much of life’s unhappiness. Most background stress for people is finances related. When you’re low on money – and I’ve been both broke or illiquid (they are different) – life is harder.
Self-care is actually good.
Aligning vision and purpose is the greatest energy boost drug of all time.
Not asking for help and finding yourself in a calamity is weak.
Happier older men feel good all the time. They consciously work on their feelings and their mood. They are always reaching for the thought that feels best.
Here are a few examples of how you could be thinking about things to create the happier life you want:
You enjoy spending time tending your money.
You know this is an important part of your life and you like working on this. It's very satisfying to sit at your desk with your computer and paper accounts, your checkbook and a calculator paying your bills, setting aside money for future needs and keeping track of your progress.
If doing this work makes you worried, stressed, frustrated or even angry, you know that part of your life is seriously amiss. I know when I was married, this is how I felt every time I sat down to pay the bills.
You enjoy planing and spending your money on rewarding material items and experiences.
It's your money that you have earned, it should feel good to spend it how you wish.
If all your money goes toward other people and their never ending wants, you won't feel good spending money. Use most of your money to pay for your needs and desires. Don't overwork trying to pay for others. This is difficult. When your children are young, they have enormous costs. A stay at home mom is very expensive. A divorce is very extremely expensive.
You spend time caring for your physical, spiritual, emotional and mental health so you can better enjoy your life and spend as long as possible here.
They do not stay with a bad wife. A bad wife will ruin your life like nothing else.
Unhappy old men stay with a wife who is not good for them. It's sad, but it's everywhere. The chance of a good life with a bad wife is zero no matter what your age.
You want no permanent bad relationships in your life. Sometimes you get yourself involved with someone who seems good at first, but then turns bad. As long as you get out before getting too deeply in, you should be fine. The problem is the longer you stay with someone who is not good for you, the more drama and trauma you deal with the longer you will be putting the good parts of life on hold and the longer it will take to put your life back together.
If you think your problem is a bad wife, I have the solution for you here -
Be happy with what you do for a living. After a bad spouse, a bad job is next on the list of things that can ruin your life. I think a good job with the normal 40 hours and quality of life benefits is ideal.
Continue to enjoy some young man activities to make you feel young:
Don't wait until you retire to do what you most want to do. You may not make it.
Don't follow stupid stories about older men doing something that young men as if all older men can do this. This is only news because it is rare. What is common is most men losing their abilities and dying fairly young.
Most men as they age cannot drive, cannot have sex, cannot eat food that needs to be chewed. Certainly they cannot put in a full 40 hours of work a week. Doing the normal things takes a monumental effort.
Keep the idea that you are going to die firmly in your mind
This forces you to act now, whatever your age, rather than waiting. It gives you a sense of urgency to get going and do what you want to do now.
I would suggest to make your plans to do as much of what you want to do before you turn 70. It is very rare for men over 70 to be able to do what they want.
Of course, if you are fit and healthy in your 70's and beyond, that would be fantastic. But if you have done much of what you have wanted to do before 70, you can just pick your favorites and do them again. Or determine a new set of goals.
Your life is now. Whatever is wrong, make it right.
Time is racing against you. There is no sense in the waiting.A Happier Man › Happiness and Health › Happier Older Men
The only way I could become the happier man I am today was by leaving my wife. You might be in the same situation I was in. I suggest you take a look at my book - Leave Your Wife & Become a Happier Man with the 3 Step System.
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