It's not easy to think for yourself. It's rare when people encourage you. It's more likely that they will be extremely eager to do all the thinking for you. For your own good of course.
After all, they know best.
And you know nothing.
If you reflect on your life you will remember this playing out over and over again. Some well meaning, or not well meaning person trying to influence you to their way of thinking. And not satisfied until you cave.
Do you? Do you say what they want you to say? Do you do what they want you to do? Do your actions change?
I used to do this all the time. Growing up. As a young man. Certainly as a husband I just did what my wife said I ought to do even though it was wrong and I hated myself for doing so.
Do I do this now?....No!
Most of your problems are caused by someone else. Not thinking for yourself gets you into all kinds of bad situations.
You going along for the ride, and you getting into trouble. Not thinking about the consequences.
You thought what you wanted did not matter. Others mattered more.
If you don't think you matter, you won't.
It's easy to let others decide. No effort is needed on your part, at least at the front end. It's at the back end, where you may need to expend massive effort to fix these problems.
Or you never fix them and suffer. This is the sad reality of most people's lives. Mediocre at best. Stagnant usually. With a good dose of suffering, pain and frustration.
Anything that you do that does not have a benefit to you directly or indirectly either now or in the very near future, is not something you ought to be doing.
I know this sounds selfish.
But being selfish is the key to a good life for you.
From Bold & Determined
And it's good for the people around you.
It is deceptive because what you might tend to do is sit around and do nothing because everything you do seems to be for other people.
Your job seems like it is for your boss.
But look closer.
Your job is for you. An income. Benefits. An outlet for your creativity. Pride in your work. A way to socialize. Ego stoking. Something to think about and talk about. Satisfaction in the doing it.
Taking care of your family seems like it is just for them.
But look deeper.
feel good when your family is well cared for by you. Pride. Love.
You feel good when they are happy, healthy, well-adjusted and content.
The love and care you provide comes back to you.
It's for you that you care for them.
I do many things for myself that most people would not even consider.
If something is making you not feel good, stop it. Or work on a way to stop it.
Your life and happiness is everything.
Questions you ought to be asking yourself all the time
These questions will usually point out where you are going wrong and help to point you to doing right for yourself.A Happier Man › Happy and Free › Think For Yourself
The only way I could become the happier man I am today was by leaving my wife. You might be in the same situation I was in. I suggest you take a look at my book - Leave Your Wife & Become a Happier Man with the 3 Step System.
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