I have 2 minimum happier man goals.
These minimums are the baseline things I need to ensure my life is very good and make my other goals happen.
And since they are baseline, it means mean something that is done over and over again.
This means I have to keep working at these forever. Forever is a long time and kind of scary.
But I need to do this.
You do too.
Maybe these are not really goals in the traditional sense. Because if you do not get this part of your life handled, everything else will not really matter.
You'll soon see what the main 2 goals are so bear with me.
Think of it this way, if you cannot walk it makes no sense to have a goal of running.
If you are starving it makes no sense to worry about the quality of the food you eat.
If you want to die young because the life you are living sucks, it won't matter how much money is in your 401k.
You see what I mean, you need to meet the minimums first.
Think of minimum baseline like the basics. Like how I described here - Back to Basics.
You need to get the basics under control. Or like in sports, work on the fundamentals.
It's not always fun to work on the fundamentals or to get back to basics. Especially when you look outside yourself and see others achieving massive success. You'd like to jump to the success they are having.
But you cannot...if the basics are not handled and the fundamentals are not under control.
I have rarely been in total control of my money...until now.
I started out on the broke side. I made no money of my own until the summer after my senior year in high school. I finally got a 40 hour a week summer job. At that time minimum wage was $4 an hour. But this was serious money for me. I bought a new bicycle. Plus I filled up my savings account for college.
But then I went to college and stopped working. I depleted that savings account in the first semester and had to beg my parents for some spending money in the second semester.
I worked again the next summer. And the next. A boom and bust cycle. A boring time consuming summer job. Make decent money. Save most of it. Go to college. Spend all of it before the year is over. Beg parents for spending money. Don't work during college, so have no income. Suffer the indignity that people without money suffer.
The 4th summer I went to summer school so I did not make any money at. None. The suffering that people go through without money shot way up for me.
But then in the spring of the following year, instead of going to college. I got a co-op job in my field for the spring semester and the following summer. 8 months of work. More than I had ever worked before. Making $8.25 an hour.
I quickly saw how critical it was to make good money and to keep working.
I easily paid my share of the bills on a nice shared 2 bedroom apartment.
I easily paid for a gym membership at a good gym.
I spent weekends having fun.
I hurt myself and spent a lot of money paying for chiropractor bills. But I could afford it.
Plus I put enough money away that I actually made it through my entire senior year with money.
I went to graduate school for 2 years after college. I was a teaching assistant working for the school so my tuition was paid and I earned a monthly stipend. I also worked 2 summers.
I was able to get by and have a little fun too. I was not scraping the bottom of the barrel like earlier in life, but I was not doing that great either.
When I finally got a real full-time job in May 1990, my financial life starting to improve dramatically. I went from barely scraping by in graduate school to making a good income. I had various savings accounts and investment accounts all within a few years. Plus I lived fairly well and and I bought a new car and paid off the loan early.
I even used some of my money for fun. Not as much as I should have. But some.
When I got married in the spring of 1994, my finances started a serious downward spiral that lasted for nearly 20 years. I did not regain full control of my finances until 2012.
All the money I made prior to 2012 is gone. Nothing to show for it. No pensions, no savings, no real estate equity, no decent cars or even usable, useful stuff that was worth anything to sell.
I did not make the main happier man goals of being in control of my money until I got my wife and then ex-wife fully out of my life.
Happier Man Goals from Caleb Jones Blog -
Favorite quote -
1. Save $1000 cash somewhere if you don’t already have it.
When I first left my wife I continued to just pay the bills as I had always done. It wasn't until the divorce process started a few months later that I quit paying the bills and started paying her.
And at first, I basically gave her all my money.
It was not until a few months later that the numbers were gone through and the divorce was well along it's way that I had some relief.
But not a lot.
I paid her a ton of money as part of the child support and alimony. A ton. About 75% of my take home pay.
I struggled for 4 years like this. Living on little. Not paying taxes to try to keep some money. Going bankrupt, again. Living on handouts from my parents.
But I was happy. I was free from her.
It was only a strange twist of fate that I was able to go back to court and get total relief from all payments to her. I go over how this happened in my book - How to Leave Your Wife and Become a Happier Man with the 3 Step System.
Now all the money that I make is mine to control.
Being in decent shape is the critical element that stops people from living well. Being out of shape means you cannot do many things. You will be stuck.
Being in decent shape implies you have a reasonable amount of health too. The two go together.
Life has a way of beating people down and when you get beat down what happens is you lose your ability to be in shape.
You cope with a miserable life by overeating junk food.
You work too much and have too much stuff you don't want to do to have any time to workout.
If this goes on for too long of a time period, even if you regain some time, your body is shot and every time you start making progress on getting in shape, you get injured and slide backwards.
Or you re-injure an old injury.
And you cope with pain and frustration by overeating cheap junk food.
This is the story of my life.
I get excited and work hard in the gym. I eat well and lose some weight. I hurt myself in the gym. I have to quit working out for months or longer. I get depressed. I eat. I eat more and more junk food.
When I was married, I had no time and no energy to even consider working out. Getting a gym membership would have strained the budget. Every day I was working long hours. Every night I was working around the house. Every night I rarely slept for 5 or 6 hours. Every day I ate a ton of food, some of it good, much of it bad.
This was my life. I was so far off the baseline goal of being in decent shape it was not funny.
At that time this seemed like the only way to live. I know many men suffer under this kind of life. A life where you have no time, money or energy for you.
You can see this happier man goals are not really that big of a deal. Every person should have enough time, money and energy to take care of themselves. If not, you need to make some massive changes so you can at least have a chance to be in decent shape.
You can see that having a good, happy life should not be so complicated.
Just get busy getting in control of your money and your body.
The only way I could become the happier man I am today was by leaving my wife. You might be in the same situation I was in. I suggest you take a look at my book - Leave Your Wife & Become a Happier Man with the 3 Step System.
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