What masculine male actions are different than regular men?
I have been reading about this and thinking about this for years. Mostly in the alpha male versus beta male way of thinking.
of my life I have spent as a normal or more beta male.
I followed the crowd, did what I was told, did not make waves, tried to
fit in. This type of lifestyle was pushed at me, pushed at all of us actually, and I thought that is
how I should be.
But deep inside something was gnawing at me. I wanted to live more. I wanted a better life. A more bold and fun life.
I can remember incidents throughout my life that held the key to this more masculine male actions type of living.
Most of my little glimpses into a this better life occurred when I was drinking.
People say that alcohol lowers your inhibitions. But I really think the alcohol just helps you to become more of what you want to be and lets the real you come out.
If you have a lot of deep seated anger from problems during your childhood, when you drink you will be a bad guy. The rage you have bottled up inside will come out. I have seen this a lot and this is what we all see a lot of. Guys getting drunk, getting in fights, being a jerk and causing problems and getting into trouble.
Next time you witness this, instead of thinking that guy is such a jerk, think he probably came from a really tough childhood. Something was not right and the drinking brings that out.
I witnessed a share of vandalism and almost hooliganism from drunk guys. I was just going out to enjoy a few drinks, joke around with some guys and hopefully get somewhere with the ladies. The guys with the pent up rage wanted to wreck cars, start fires and break stuff.
This is a real problem.
I never feel like hurting people and breaking things when I drink. I like to have fun, without hurting others or destroying property. Of course, I had a nice, easy-going childhood with wonderful parents with one of the better dads.
If you want to be a ladies man and get more women, when you drink you will be more charming, more daring, more bold and more fun.
This is more me, at least what I want to be. I find it a lot more fun to talk with girls, flirt with them and maybe have some fun with them, than breaking things.
I don't find breaking things fun at all. I am repelled by this, but I do understand where it comes from.
My Lack of Masculine Male Actions in High School
Why did I spend my my high school years not having any success with women before I started drinking. Why was the first time I really even talked to a girl and kiss her the same night I started drinking?
Why do I struggle with women most of the time. Why do I only meet women after I have had a number of drinks?
Why is it so hard to meet women outside of bars, parties and festivals where people are drinking?
Why could I have fantastic success with women a few times when most of the time I did not?
I think it was because I was able to exhibit the masculine male actions that women love so much and cannot resist.
Why would they not look at me today but tomorrow when I was perfectly drunk, bold and a lot of fun, they had to be with me?
The masculine male actions of doing what you want seems to be it.
When you drink, you do mostly what you want. You say what you want to say. You are where you want to be.
You are having fun in the moment exhibiting masculine male actions and women respond favorably to that.
From Danger and Play
Favorite quote - Rather than think of ways to impose myself on others, I choose to view the world as one of infinite possibilities.
Favorite quote - Rule 13: No one has the right to make you unhappy.
From Bold and Determined
Favorite quote - The only thing that truly projects strength is….STRENGTH
When you watch the famous ladies man actors in their interviews
they talk as if they are mildly drunk. They sit back in their chairs in
total comfort and ease. They say outrageous things. They laugh and
If you watch them through your beta male eyes you will get enraged about their masculine male actions and wild behavior. How can those idiotic fools get all the girls, they seem so stupid? You think how could anyone fall for them they seem drunk.
You have to put 2 and 2 together to get it. They act that way because it is not an act. It is masculine male actions. They are cool. They say whatever stupid thing pops into their heads and laugh it off. If a normal guy says something stupid, he feels bad for a long time afterward, maybe a lifetime.
You don't want to feel bad about much of anything. You need to
feel good about everything in your life. Even when you say or do something wrong.
That is why more alpha type males do so well with women. They feel good and this helps others around them feel good.
Who would you rather hang around with? A cool guy with masculine male actions who women are drawn to, who laughs and jokes around and has a great life that is interesting to hear about? Or would you rather hang around with a guy who is boring, possibly boorish, who women cannot stand, whose life is a mess, who criticizes everything and whenever he talks it is about something boring or stupid or trivial?
Friends with Masculine Male Actions
I had friends who had the masculine male actions and friends who were not. I quickly discovered that I had a lot more fun and was around a lot more women when I was with the more masculine type guys.
I started to learn and take on those qualities. When I was with my beta type friends, women were repelled. They just did not like those guys. They were my friends, but they dressed poorly, got obnoxiously drunk, had odd mannerisms and had almost zero charm with people. They were either clueless with women or boorish.
The alpha types, on the other hand,
dressed as well as they could at the time, were always happy and upbeat
and people were drawn to this, including women.
When I thought about my success with women I usually did much better when I was out with a few of my alpha type friends, having fun with masculine male actions.
If you are out with some guys who repel women you will not do very good. Women know men quite well. They can tell if a guy is clueless. If you are out with cooler guys you will do better.
If you are a serious beta, or worse, you will be enraged about all this. You will see you have spent a lifetime being stupid about how to attract women and bring the bitterness.
But you can change to masculine male actions if you really want to. Some aspects of doing this are not that difficult. You can quickly do some things to bring yourself up a notch or two.
Here are some easy ways to at least look more like you have masculine male actions
Care about your hair
I know it seems vain and stupid. But women care about a man's hair. Why do you think they swooned over the Beatles, love the stringy hair of rock stars, and cannot get enough of the teen idols? They get into the hair and the fame. You may not have the fame, but you can get the hair.
At least keep it cut nice and tight, especially if you are balding.
Get in better shape
It doesn't look
to me as alpha males are all in perfect condition. But it does look
like working out is a part of their lifestyle. They attempt to watch
what they eat. They engage in some physical hobbies to have a baseline
fitness. They lift weights. Be healthy. They sleep enough. They eat better. They exercise. They care about their health.
Again, this seems vain and stupid. But women care how a man dresses. An alpha male dresses well. They are put together right. They dress for the occasion. They are clean and manicured.
Be More Relaxed
Sit, walk and stand in a relaxed manner. They are not fidgeting all the time. Be more relaxed and carefree about life in general.
are just a few of the simple things you can do to be more of an alpha
I know you have read a lot of articles on how to be better with women. I certainly have. I have a ways to go, but I have had some success with women in the past and some recent success too.
Here is a few simple ways to have more masculine actions with women
Be Out in Public More
You need to go out more, hang around in public more and be in more places where women are.
I have been to places where there were no women, or where the guys outnumbered women by a serious margin or where the women were, sorry to say, quite hideous. So there is zero chance of doing well.
I have been to places where there were so many cute women having fun, that it was difficult not to meet many new women.
Location and proximity help.
You cannot be lazy on this.
But it sometimes seems that men get themselves into locations either by choice or force where the number of women is extremely small. The military is an obvious bad place to be for women. Rural areas and small towns are notorious for a lack of women. I went to a college that was famous for engineering. There are very few women in engineering, so there were very few women in my college.
You get the idea. It is not only much easier to meet women and have good times with them when there are a lot of women, it is almost impossible to meet women or expect to get anywhere with them if there are hardly any women.
There are a lot of movies set in remote locations where the hero of the movie ends up with the one gorgeous women in the small town. Movie made up stuff of course. Gorgeous women are rare in small towns. If she was born there, she will quickly move to the big city as soon as she can.
That's the reality.
You have to touch girls otherwise they think you're not a man. This does not have to be a Donald Trump groping, but it may be. If you are in a bar, and everyone is drinking, touching is what you do. I think it's laughable about the Trump stories anyway. Who doesn't like kissing?
Get closer to them
Stand right by them. The other night I went on a first date. We had a few drinks. I was casual and relaxed in our corner table. Sitting back and talking. But I did not really touch her until after we had talked for about 2 hours. Probably too long to wait. The bar stool was so uncomfortable I finally stood up and just stood right by her, within a few inches. At some point I just leaned in for the kiss naturally. From there it was a lot of kissing right in the bar, in front of total strangers. And it was good. But I needed to be close. You need to be close. Get up there, close to her.
Don't be afraid to put your hands on girls
Avoid the hoverhand at all costs. Get your hands on her. She will let you know if it is too much. Then just stop, it's quite simple.
I have always done this. Some of my friends have been offended by this, but girls rarely are. Of course, those friends have marveled at how simple it was for me to go far with girls this way. But it is not magic, it is just masculine male actions. Masculine men want to touch girls. Girls liked to be touched by masculine men.
Go outside with her.
If I am talking with a girl who smokes, I always go outside with when she needs a smoke break. This works, you're outside together, it's quiet, more private. If it's cold, this is even better. She'll shiver, you'll naturally offer yourself as warmth.
Pretty soon, it will be natural to kiss. Girls who smoke are often excellent kissers. If you can get by the smoke smell. They usually smoke a better smelling brand or less harsh brand anyway. It does not bother me to be making out with a gorgeous woman who smokes, enjoying her talented tongue with mine and with my hands all over her slim, sexy body.
I shouldn't be surprised about this anymore. Some of the most intense make out sessions of my post married life were with women who smoked and who I went outside with her when she smoked.
Typically, she will not just want to stay outside and kiss all night. She will want to go back inside. But she will need to smoke again later. So go out with her next time. More kissing, more fun, it can go on all night like this.
At the end of the night you may find yourself in bed with her, maybe a new girlfriend, certainly a phone number and even more intense make out session at the end of the night.
Take her somewhere else
The other side of the bar. Outside. To a different place. Anywhere. Grab her hand and walk. Say - let's go over there for a few minutes, I want to see what it's like. You're curious. She's curious. It's fun.
The big thing to do is to shift your mindset.
You have to understand that you have to change how you are to be this
You cannot just be you if you are not satisfied with how you are. It is too simplistic to say just be yourself. What if being yourself is not good enough for you? Often, the person you think is you has been shaped and forced to be someone you do not want to be.
The advice to just be yourself is totally wrong
if how you are is making you miserable. If you are miserable just being
yourself, what do you have to lose by making changes?
If you look at my little list of alpha male actions you will see that these things are not that hard to do but millions of men do not do these things. Millions of men are in misery. What would it hurt to do those things. Make an attempt to look better. Get more fit. Get healthy. Live a more relaxed, carefree life. Even if you do not make it exactly to where you want to be, you will at least have a far better life.
You have to care about your life to the exclusion of others. I know this may seem callous and unfeeling. But this is really important.
You will have a terrible life the more you focus on pleasing others by excluding pleasing yourself. Your life will get worse moment to moment and day by day if you care about others more than you care about yourself.
This is really not an easy thing to do.
We are ingrained and taught to care more about others than ourselves. But this is the huge mindset shift you will have to take if you want to live a better life.
If you cannot do this, you will never make it. A happier man is me oriented, not you oriented. It is so simple, but so hard. You
have to create your life how you want it.
If you honestly study this you will see what I am saying is true. Think about the alpha male type guys you know and how they really are. Get inside their mind and think how they think. Think about famous men with the fantastic lives and think how they think. Are those guys worried about others, about what other people think? Do they stay with women who are not good to them? Do they hang out with people who they do not like? Do they do things they do not like to do?
They certainly feel bad about the misfortunes of others, but not much. They certainly do nice things for others.
But mostly they are busy doing
what they want to do.
The only way I could become the happier man I am today was by leaving my wife. You might be in the same situation I was in. I suggest you take a look at my book - Leave Your Wife & Become a Happier Man with the 3 Step System.
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