Your Future Happiness

In addition to your happiness now you need to think about your future happiness.  The next most important person in your life after the present you is the future you.

But most people get this wrong. 

Some people just focus on the future, squirreling away all their money now, scraping and scrimping, never doing anything fun.  Many stay in a bad job rather than going after something better because of the fear of loss of retirement benefits or starting over.  Or even worse, some stay in a bad marriage to avoid the loss of money and property from a divorce.

This overemphasis on the future you will ruin your present.

Some people just focus on the present.  Overeating, over-drinking, over-drugging and over merriment now with no thought of how overdoing anything now, which is just hard living, will negatively impact your future happiness.

I've been somewhat guilty of both these extremes.  When I was a younger man I found it difficult to spend some of the money I earned on my desires.  I did to a small degree occasionally and have the fantastic memories of those great times to enjoy for the rest of my life. 

But I tended to not do much of this.  I set aside a large percentage of my income for the future. And I felt guilty whenever I did spend more on traveling, fun adventures, nicer clothes or enjoyments of whatever kind.

But all this guilt, extreme effort and dedicated frugality was totally wasted with no good memories to show for it and no money in the bank because I spent all this money trying to please my wife with an expensive house, expensive remodeling and generally overdoing everything.

When I finally realized I could not have any chance at a good life staying married to her, I stayed longer partly out of fear of loss of money from a divorce.

Plus I neglected my health when I was married

  • Never exercising
  • Never going to the dentist
  • Eating excessive carbs
  • Not eating much meat
  • Just working long hours at work and longer at home
  • Rarely sleeping enough
  • Absorbing verbal abuse from my wife
  • Tip-toeing around her to try to avoid her wrath
  • And trying to cope with the enormous stress of all this by massively overeating junk food.

But just because I made these huge mistakes in my earlier life doesn't mean I have to keep making them now.  I am enjoying my present much more now and am making my future happiness much more likely.

I am at the point where I don't feel the need to cope with huge amounts of junk food.  I still finding myself coping a bit at times.  But most of my food choices tend to be healthy with plenty of meat and a reduction in carbs. 

I put some money away for a future me.  But I am also enjoying a bit of my money now.

Maybe you just need some minor adjustments to ensure your future is going to be good.

But you probably need to make a major change now.  You may be in a toxic marriage, or horrible work environment or have really bad habits.

It's time to turn off the TV and focus on your life and your future happiness.

Critical Elements for Your Future Happiness

I think you can boil down the main elements needed to create your future happiness like this:

  • Earn a decent living
  • Be reasonably healthy
  • Ensure and insure
  • Have some fun
  • Avoid bad relationships

Earn a Good Living and Enjoy It

Earning a decent living that pays the bills, allows for a bit of a surplus, that you are good at and enjoy and helps the world at least a little bit is the most important thing a person does.

If you don't do this, you are depending on others to take care of you.  They may not appreciate it.  They may do it badly. 

You will certainly feel the negative vibe of being dependent on others surrounding you.  No one appreciates those who are dependent and could be independent.  We, of course, understand that some people need a lot of help.  What we hate are the people who could take care of themselves, or at least not be such a burden, and don't work.

Not having enough money to take care of yourself in a fairly decent manner is going to be the shortest route to a miserable life and an early grave.

From the New York Times

Who Killed the Knapp Family

Favorite quotes -

“The meaningfulness of the working-class life seems to have evaporated,” Angus Deaton, the Nobel Prize-winning economist, told us. “The economy just seems to have stopped delivering for these people.”

A Harvard sociologist, William Julius Wilson, countered that the true underlying problem was lost jobs, and he turned out to be right. When good jobs left white towns like Yamhill a couple of decades later because of globalization and automation, the same pathologies unfolded there. Men in particular felt the loss not only of income but also of dignity that accompanied a good job.

Well-paying jobs disappeared, partly because of technology and globalization but also because of political pressure on unions and a general redistribution of power toward the wealthy and corporations.

Making a good living is the most important factor in your future happiness.

Some other working and income related articles to ensure your future happiness:

A lot of times they say that taking care of your health is more important than an income.

It's not.

It's second for good reason.  Everything flows from your work and income.  Not the other way around.

Millions of people are totally unhealthy, suffering in pain, dealing with massive health problems and yet they are still working, putting in a full day or close, working hard, feeling good about themselves, not being a burden on others, chipping in and doing the best they can.

You don't need to be healthy to work.

It's better to be healthy of course.  But you can still work even if you are not.

Yes, there may come a time when your health is so deteriorated or you have lost the ability to work due to circumstances beyond your control and you will need to rely on others and the government.

That's fine.  That's why there is a government safety net, good families, generous people and charities to help you.

Take Care of Your Health for Your Future Happiness

Will you still be squatting heavy weights in your 80's or will you have a hard time getting off the toilet or be bed-ridden or dead?

But just because you don't need to be healthy to work, doesn't mean you should not be healthy for yourself.  Feeling good is better than feeling bad.

Sometimes the reason you are so unhealthy is from working

  • Physically demanding jobs
  • Jobs that are inherently dangerous
  • Extremely boring jobs
  • Work that is more difficult than your capacity to perform it
  • Toxic work environments
  • Irritating co-workers
  • Constantly changing jobs chasing more money
  • Temptation to overeat junk food
  • Long hours
  • Poor health insurance benefits so you avoid necessary medical care
  • Low pay creating an overall lack in your life
  • Long commutes sucking up all your free time

All these negatives surrounding work make trying to have some sort of a life and staying healthy very difficult.

When you study what is said you need to do to be healthy, the number of hours in day don't add up when you add in the hours a day for working.

That being said, there are a number of fairly simple things you can do to keep some of your health:

  • Eat properly.  Eat plenty of animal protein with the fat included.  Eating this way is much easier and a time saver.  Eat minimal carbs of whatever sort, especially the junk food variety. This should help to reduce your belly size, increase your energy and make you feel a lot better.
  • You may need to supplement your diet.  Some of the main supplements for aging men seem to be creatine, Vitamin D, Vitamin C, Fish Oil, magnesium, iodine and resveratrol.
  • You may need to go on Testosterone Replacement Therapy.
  • Avoid excessive, daily bad habits.  These will rob you of your health. Overeating, over-drinking, over-smoking and over-drugging is killing you and you know it.
  • Sleep the normal 8 hours or more. 
  • Spend more of your free time resting, relaxing with your feet up and recharging.
  • Heal from injuries.  If you've hurt yourself, you will need to let your injuries heal instead of always trying to train through them.
  • Train with weights to build your strength.  But do so at a pace you can handle. I find once or twice a week to be the most I can do without getting rundown and injured and just generally feeling bad.
  • Get some sunshine
  • Have fun and laugh often
  • Keep active and do other forms of exercise within your capacity.  Avoid going overboard and inuring yourself and getting rundown.
  • Avoid whatever toxic situations you can.  Dangerous work environments.  Dangerous living locations.  Toxic relationships.
  • Deal with health related issues as they come up rather than delaying them.
  • Keep a good attitude.

Ensure and Insure for Your Future Happiness

Deal responsibly with known issues and create a bit of a surplus in critical areas to help you ride out future problems.

  • The right amount of insurance (Health, disability, vehicle, life, etc)
  • Travel related programs like AAA to help you on the road.
  • A charged up cell phone
  • Baseline savings of a few thousand dollars in cash and a few more thousand in an easily accessible savings account.
  • Cash on you and easily available.
  • Available credit.  Cash is better than credit, but credit is better than nothing. 
    Cash is better than credit, because in extreme times, how do you know credit will work.
  • Pay your bills early to build your credit, develop goodwill with businesses and give you the critical peace of mind of "my bills are paid".
  • Pay down, or off, your credit lines of whatever sort giving you more spendable or saveable money.
  • Stored food and water.  I have about a week's worth of each.  I'm not a hard-core prepper, but I think being prepared for a brief hard time is wise.
  • Keeping things prepared and up to date.  Have all the things you need on hand so you don't run out.  Groceries, gassed up vehicles, normal personal items, prescriptions, supplements.  You know you need all this already.  Why wait until the last second?
  • If you have sick leave at your work and have the option to keep building it up, do so.  Usually sick leave accounts like this are very valuable in case you get extremely sick, of course, or to help you in your retirement years.  Don't use it like extra vacation time.  And if you do get sick, use it sparingly.
  • If you have the option to put vacation time into a Sabbatical account that you can save for later, do it.

Have Some Responsible Fun Now

Having some fun is critical to your well-being.  This is what gives you the laughs, builds your memory bank for the future you and makes for a great life in the now.  But sometimes people go overboard.

  • Extreme sports injuring yourself severely.
  • Partying too often or too hard.
  • Partying with the wrong people.
  • Spending enormous amounts they might not have on expensive travel and hobbies.

I think you can have plenty of fun without going overboard, spending tons of money, hurting yourself or impacting your future happiness. 

Avoid Bad Relationships

This is, of course, crucial to your happiness now and your future happiness.  You won't care about your house, your 401k, what your vacation plans, your hobbies, contributing to your career or even your children's well-being if you are in a bad marriage.

All you will care about will be trying to survive another day.  Or hoping you die young to escape the torment you are in.

If you are in a bad marriage, one that is destroying you, either quickly, or slowly, get my book - Leave Your Wife and Become a Happier Man with the 3 Step System.  It will save your life, like it did mine.

You have no chance at a good life in a bad marriage.  Either now or the future.

Your Future Happiness Video Thoughts

Your Future Happiness Wrap Up

Focus on your life and the 5 critical elements in it.

  1. Earn a decent living
  2. Be reasonably healthy
  3. Ensure and insure
  4. Have some fun
  5. Avoid bad relationships

A good life for you now and your future happiness are not are not mutually exclusive if you do it right.

› Your Future Happiness

The only way I could become the happier man I am today was by leaving my wife.  You might be in the same situation I was in.  I suggest you take a look at my book - Leave Your Wife & Become a Happier Man with the 3 Step System.

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